Brisbane support group- Anyone interested?

Ask questions about Paruresis, tell your story, talk about it!
potholes
Posts: 4
Joined: Tue Apr 07, 2009 10:00 pm

Brisbane support group- Anyone interested?

Post by potholes » Wed Apr 08, 2009 6:00 pm

Hi again,

I take it from the lack of replies to my last post that nobody is really interested in my situation. However, I won't throw in the towel just yet.

I would like to start a brisbane-based support group in order to help people north of the border overcome paruresis.

I guess it will be relatively informal to start with, but hopefully it can develop into a regular event.

if anyone is interested please feel free to post a reply.

Cheers.

Oliver

JohnW
Site Admin
Posts: 97
Joined: Sat Jan 10, 2009 9:42 pm

Re: Brisbane support group- Anyone interested?

Post by JohnW » Thu Apr 09, 2009 12:25 am

This is a fairly sleepy site, and the fact that no-one replied immediately is not very surprising.
Attempts have been made for quite some time to get a support group started in Brisbane (I know of a handful of contacts), but nothing has come of it. One attempt which was made some time ago on our earlier website, a site that was less sleepy (!!), resulted in nothing that I am aware of.
For a support group to be an official Paruresis Association of Australia group, we normally require that the support group leader firstly attend one of our annual workshops, held alternately in Sydney and Melbourne. The next (early in 2010 probably) I expect to be in Sydney.
JohnW

potholes
Posts: 4
Joined: Tue Apr 07, 2009 10:00 pm

Re: Brisbane support group- Anyone interested?

Post by potholes » Thu Apr 09, 2009 8:31 pm

Thanks for your reply mate.

I will have to attend one of the annual events in Sydney I guess,

I was thinking of a support group that was less formal though. My biggest problem is that I don't have anyone who I can talk to about paruresis, and therefore I don't have anyone who can help me through the desensitisation process.

I guess I just wanted to gather paruretics in Brisbane who, like me, do not have anyone who they can go to for support. Even if it was an unofficial support group it would still offer a therapeutic space for sufferers, and hopefully it will allow those who attend to try desensitisation.


Oliver

Bruce
Posts: 6
Joined: Fri May 29, 2009 2:24 pm

Re: Brisbane support group- Anyone interested?

Post by Bruce » Fri May 29, 2009 2:32 pm

I'd be interested in joining a Brisbane support group. I've had the problem for over 40 years and have managed to live a fairly normal life by deleloping many strategies to avoid having to stand next to someone at a urinal. But it would be good to meet face to face with another person who has the problem and have a bit of a chat. I reckon that sharing the problem and maybe having a bit of a laugh about it could be helpful. Tonight was the first time I've ever visited this site.
Bruce

JohnW
Site Admin
Posts: 97
Joined: Sat Jan 10, 2009 9:42 pm

Re: Brisbane support group- Anyone interested?

Post by JohnW » Sat May 30, 2009 2:37 am

Oliver and Bruce,
I would like you both to send me PM's (Private Messages) via this forum's facilities, or directly at recov2000AThotmailDOTcom (decipher it!) so that I can include your email addresses in my list of Brisbane contacts. If the two of you do manage to start some informal practice, then at least I can inform the others on my list (there are quite a few), and perhaps a support group will grow out of this. I feel much frustration that nothing has come of our attempts to start a group in Brisbane. Perhaps Oliver and Bruce will be the beginnings of it.
JohnW

Bruce
Posts: 6
Joined: Fri May 29, 2009 2:24 pm

Re: Brisbane support group- Anyone interested?

Post by Bruce » Sat May 30, 2009 11:53 am

OK John, I'll send you a message
Bruce

Bruce
Posts: 6
Joined: Fri May 29, 2009 2:24 pm

Re: Brisbane support group- Anyone interested?

Post by Bruce » Sun Jun 28, 2009 4:36 am

This sure is a sleepy site! Oliver are you still interested in making contacts with someone in Brisbane?
I'm about to go on an outback trip with an all bloke party - a potential nightmare for a paruetic! Having had the problem for a long time, I have lots of strategies to allow for a reasonably normal life. But what happens if we break down in the middle of the desert with no trees around!! My plan is to share my 'problem' with all of them early in the trip, so that they will understand if I need to go for a longish walk sometimes. This will put me in new territory but I hope it will make my trip more enjoyable instead of having concerns at times as to how I'm going to sneak in my next pee. On the other hand it could backfire somehow. A few years ago I would not have gone on a such a trip with an all male party. Having women around is good as it isn't the done thing to stand in front of a woman in the middle of the bush and pee. Anyway I hope I have the guts to tell them the story and I'll report back when I get home.

rossco309
Posts: 88
Joined: Tue Jan 13, 2009 12:18 pm

Re: Brisbane support group- Anyone interested?

Post by rossco309 » Wed Jul 01, 2009 12:50 am

Hi Bruce,

I'm glad you have decided to tell some of your friends about your paruresis. I'm sure this will take alot of the stress off for you during the trip.
Remember this is a Social Anxiety Disorder, and therefore is mostly in the mind, and our thinking is disordered about what other people are thinking about us.

I have found that anytime when I have told my friends that I have been travelling with about my AP, they have all been very supportive and seem to understand why I may want to use a cubicle or take longer at a urinal etc... I have never had any problem, despite my nervousness, about telling them in the first place!!

Why not take a copy or two about paruresis from this excellent VIC GOV website along with you to give to any of your friends who show any real interest. >
http://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/bhcv ... drome?open

Enjoy your travels 'out back'...maybe the Brisbane Group can get going when you come home again.

Regards, Ross (Sydney Support Group)

JohnW
Site Admin
Posts: 97
Joined: Sat Jan 10, 2009 9:42 pm

Re: Brisbane support group- Anyone interested?

Post by JohnW » Wed Jul 01, 2009 6:00 pm

Bruce, that shows a lot of courage, but I do think it's a good idea. It will be interesting whether any of them owns up to sometimes having the problem. I once disclosed my paruresis to a guy I knew only slightly, as I was on a high after having had a great success in my practising earlier in the day - I had stood between two men at a 3-man trough in a public toilet and had success! Anyway I began to describe what it is, when he said that he had the same problem. We became quite close friends. He had other issues in his life, and I don't think he has overcome his paruresis.
Best wishes for your time away.
JohnW

Bruce
Posts: 6
Joined: Fri May 29, 2009 2:24 pm

Re: Brisbane support group- Anyone interested?

Post by Bruce » Sat Aug 15, 2009 8:13 pm

Well I'm back from my outback trip and I'm afraid to say that I chickened out! I was never game enough to tell the story. I had taken the excellent handout on Paruresis from the Vic government but didn't get to use it. Anyway I had a good trip and used the many techniques I've developed over the years to avoid peeing in public. We didn't break down in the middle of a tree less gibber plain but I reckon that I'd have found a solution if that had happened. eg walking away from the cars for a couple of hundred minutes to get a long distance photo of the breakdown in the lonely desert! Cameras are very useful excuses to go to secluded places! But during the trip I kept thinking what it would be like to do such a trip with a group of paruretics. It would sure beat meeting up once a week. Something to think about.
I have made contact with a paruretic in Brisbane and we plan to meet soon to have a chat.
Bruce

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